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Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Regression

"Regression occurs where a person returns to a child state to escape the present."

They say regression is common in children, especially when dealing with potty training. I am definitely going through this with my middle child! He has decided to go potty everywhere, EXCEPT the toilet. I just spent 30 minutes(while all the other kids are napping all you moms know how sacred this time is) scrubbing my bedroom carpet leading to the toilet including right in front of the toilet. When I look into the bowl there is just clear water not a single trace of anything! (I'm not just talking about pee either, at least not this case) Yesterday he decides to pee in the van! The day before that, on the stairs it sounded like I had one of those zen water fountain things that is supposed to calm you. Which by the way I don't think I WILL EVER find that noise calming again!

He has been day time potty trained for about 6 months now, but for the past week it has been just plain awful! The professionals say to think about what has changed in the child's life, and this will explain why the child has regressed.  When I think about what the heck has changed in a week that is causing him to regress this much... Daddy leaving for a temporary duty assignment, TDY! It amazes me how much and how quickly my middle son has regressed. Daddy just left last Weds. so it's only been a week, it's like the day after daddy leaves BAM! I am in no way blaming Daddy, this is the way military life is and I often hear that almost all military kids regress when dad leaves for a deployment. It doesn't make it suck any less! It amazes me how in their little minds when something changes, they decide NOPE not going to do it!

So that brings me to my next concern, there will be so much change happening to our family in the next few months. We will be homeless for at least 2 months, while we are in transition moving from Minot ND to Lakenheath England. Middle Son will be starting pre-school, and oldest daughter will be starting Kindergarten so she won't be home all day. I only have to wonder... when we finally get him back on track with potty training, is this regression going to rear it's ugly, messy, stinky, head again, because honestly I am DONE dealing with POOP! Here's hoping that Son #3 will be ready to be potty trained very soon because after dealing with it for 5 years, I'm not dealing with it for another 2!

When I read the definition of regression in relation to children that I mentioned at the beginning, I start to think about how even as adults we regress to a child like state to escape the present. No, you don't see grown adults peeing and pooping everywhere, but you do see moms and dads screaming at their children because they are so tired or fed up or just plain cranky, (guilty), or throwing a tantrum because something doesn't happen when, where, and how they want it to, (guilty), cry & whine because they've just had enough and can't verbalize what they are feeling, (guilty). So when I think about how adults, even me, can regress it makes me feel so much better when I'm scrubbing those carpets/stairs/vehicle/laminate flooring/bed sheets!! :)

There is a light at the end of the tunnel!!
  As a friend mentioned the other day, when talking to a pediatrician about potty training their response is always "Well you never see a boy in college still in diapers!" Her response to that... "Well, mine just might be the 1st!" AMEN to that HAHA

2 comments:

LandB'sMom said...

This shall pass. We are dealing with this with Blake. Never once had he had an accident. Potty trained for a year then his dad left and his world ended (so he things). He now wets himself atleast 4 times a week has the worst attitude, and at times drives me up the flipping wall. I just no longer make a big deal about it. If he goes in his pants he cleans it up and gets changed and that is that. Logans doctor told me its just a control thing and if this is all hes doing be thankful haha. I am here for you when you need me day or night. Do not EVER hesitate to just drop him off so you can get a break.

LandB'sMom said...

Oh my gosh i so about freaked out. I was like why the heck is LandBs mom posting what i wrote...yeah im special.

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